Wai Lana Thai Curry and Lime

Like the disturbing surprise ending of a favorite TV show, today’s review marks the point where once pleasantly enjoyable series takes a completely out-of-character turn for the intensely dark.  And who could have seen it coming from so promising and upstanding a product as Wai Lana’s Thai Curry and Lime, made of yucca chips seasoned with coconut powder, shallot leaf, cane sugar, an array of curry seasonings?  Surely I should be handing out accolades and awards!  
 
The faithful emulation of the taste of bile in my mouth, however, is just a little too authentic.  In my many written excesses, I have never before stooped to describing my subjects as tasting like vomit, because by and large crisps rarely taste worse than uninspired and boring- crisps that are actually icky in some manner are few and far between.

No joke here: do yourself a favor and
obtain for your mouth an actual Thai curry.

Certainly, these new Wai Lana crisps enter the mouth with just as much promise as the earlier ones I reviewed, exuding a piquant aroma of curry and other assorted spices that, while unfashionable in their intensity, would seem to be precisely the sort of stronger and more authentic flavorings I have always passionately advocated.  The crisps are soft, crunchy, and mildly sweet making them a good compliment for the concept.  Yes, they are even spicy, burning pleasantly in the back of the throat, though I’m not sure that there’s any Lime flavoring to speak of from what I can taste.

As the seasonings percolate through your mouth, however, you realize at first that they are decidedly odd and off setting, and then suddenly they are odd and off-setting in a familiar way, reminiscent your mouth after that nauseatingly long car drive after the thanksgiving meal which didn’t quite set in your gut.  The burn at the back of your throat starts to seem less like some charming spice and more like the acrid sensation of stomach acids in attack mode, located north of where they should be.

 On the well-established principle that a rich and respected perpetrator should be offered superior consideration to a poor victim, I feel compelled to still award these chips a full star, even though I found myself shuddering at the thought of consuming even one more for the purely scientific purposes of this review.  The reason for my lenience: these do boldly go where no man has gone befor- attempt to deliver certain spicy sensations that are too extreme for my fragile western palette, but just because I can’t stand them doesn’t mean they mightn’t appeal to a person of more radical, or at least, curried tastes.  Those of you who think you can take it, give it a try and report back to me- or try eating durian.

Stars: 1/4

Spiciness: Moderate

Pros:

- Crisps are softly crunchy, offer excellent surface area

- Properly spicy as they well should be

- Authentic tasting seasonings

Cons:

- The seasonings end up tasting odd and off putting

- When combined with spicy sensation, the seasonings start to resemble bile

- No lime flavoring in evidence