Monday, June 18, 2012

Krunchers! Sweet Hawaiian Onion Kettle Cooked Potato Chips

           What on Earth - or should I say, “what in the Pacific Ocean”- is a Sweet Hawaiian Onion?  As it turns out the Krunchers brand isn’t inventing a mythical pineapple-flavored onion, but rather is referring to the ‘Maui Onion’- so called because the best ones are grown off the side of a goddamned volcano in Maui called Mount Haleakala, and how much more awesome could something be than that? 

Despite it's volcano-loving
proclivities, the Maui onion can be
grown in a home garden.
That sinister red volcanic soil produces small onions with unusually low amounts of sulfer and high amounts of water- resulting in a vegetable extra juicy and sweet as a mob mistress.  In fact, these exemplary onions are recommended for raw-eating, which makes me want to one up Johny appleseed by munching away on Maui onions and planting them on every field I can find.  (Ok, to be fair, the Georgia-grown Vidalia onion is also similar in taste and consistency.)

According to Hawaian folklore, the demigod Maui's
grandma lives in the crater on Mt. Haleakala, and
one spring day she might yet pour a tide of liquid
hot magma death instead of onions down the
 slopes of her awesomely named home.
 So, has Kruncher’s really made specifically ‘Maui onion’ chips?  Well, unfortunately, I can’t tell for sure.  To their credit, ‘onion powder’ is nearly at the top of the ingredient list, but no details as to whether it’s Hawaiian onion powder (maybe it is, but I certainly can’t tell!), and the rest of the list is all chemicals of one variety or another with the exception of a hint of garlic powder.  The seasoning does taste mildly sweet, and mercifully light on salt (unlike many other otherwise tasty onion-flavored products).  Some might find themselves wanting to ramp up the sweetness or saltiness dial, but the principle shortcoming is unfortunately much more serious.

One of the few flavors I don't
want to taste in my food.
        That relatively mild sweet onion flavor is completely overpowered by the oil that crisps have been cooked in.  These otherwise impressive kettle-cooked chips have been thoroughly soaked in a (non-trans fat) corn oil that reeks of the sort of cooking oil usually poured on a skillet.  While some may feel that the rough oil brings an authentic touch, it may simply be that it is too authentic, and overpowers the flavoring by far.


An excellent image of Krunchers chips
courtesy of realfitmama.  Note that
they don't have visible seasoning.
This is truly tragic, because in most other regards the texture and potato crisps are really first class kick-ass.  The blonde potato rounds are extra thick (up to 2 millimeters!) , twisted and rumpled in beautifully complex shapes, and wonderfully crunchy in an organically uneven sort of way.  As you munch away at them, you can even feel the (too-strong) oils seeping coolly out of the saturated crisps onto the tongue.  (I should note that the nutritional information shows these chips to be no more unhealthy than an average bag of Lay’s potato chips- and these are gluten free!)

            Ultimately, the over-saturation of the cooking oil flavor and the comparative weakness of the seasoning leaves me feeling that these chips didn’t quite carry the day- Maui onion flavor is a neat concept, but the seasoning is too subtle and the cooking oil is as a discrete as She-Hulk before the red moon.  The amazing quality of the potato round does leave me intrigued about trying other Kruncher’s products; perhaps if I swiped some actual Maui onions and mixed them together I'd get the complete experience.
She Hulk making a subtle
entrance.



Stars: 2/4
Spiciness Rating: None

Pros:
- Incredibly thick and crunchy kettle cooked potato rounds impress with their class and texture
- Inoffensive and light sweet onion flavoring is pleasant and avoids the excessive saltiness common in the genre

Cons:
- Super-excessive corn-oil flavoring oversaturates the chips and overpowers the seasonin
- Many will find themselves wishing for a sweet and possibly slightly-saltier onion seasoning
- It’s unclear that the seasoning is really very ‘Hawaiian’

15 comments:

  1. Hemorrhoids are vascular tissues that assist in fecal control in the
    rectum duct. There are also manual and surgical procedures to eliminate hemorrhoids.
    These can also cause increased pressure in
    the hemorrhoid veins.

    Feel free to surf to my homepage :: internal Piles+treatment+symptoms

    ReplyDelete
  2. I have read so many articles or reviews concerning
    the blogger lovers except this piece of writing is truly a
    good paragraph, keep it up.

    Here is my web page does Raspberry ketones Work

    ReplyDelete
  3. Үouг current гeρort offers confirmeԁ helpful to
    myѕеlf. It’s extremelу eԁucаtional and уou're simply certainly extremely knowledgeable in this field. You have got popped my own face for you to numerous views on this specific subject together with intriguing and sound articles.

    Also visit my webpage ... ambien
    My homepage : buy ambien

    ReplyDelete
  4. I'm really enjoying the design and layout of your website. It's a
    veгy еasу on thе eуes whiсh
    maκes it much more ρleaѕаnt for me to come here аnd visіt moгe οften.
    Dіd уou hігe out a deνeloρer to cгеate уour theme?
    Outѕtanding woгk!

    Feеl freе to ѕurf to my pаgе:
    plano houses for rent

    ReplyDelete
  5. great submit, very informative. I'm wondering why the other experts of this sector don't notice this.
    You must continue your writing. I'm sure, you've a huge readers' base already!

    My page ... raspberry ketone diet

    ReplyDelete
  6. I gotta bookmark this website it seems extremely helpful very useful. Thanks for sharing.

    ReplyDelete
  7. with small pox all over the news how bad is it really, is it like what thewy showed in house
    Very good article, tx for taking the time to write it.
    love-binding-spell-caster

    ReplyDelete
  8. This really solved my problem, thank you!
    Brilliant, thanks, I will bookmark you now.
    My boss has just replaced his Porsche Boxster with a Porsche 997 Turbo. He started it up outside the office and I swear all the windows rattled. It sounds absolutely amazing, and goes like an absolute rocket

    Brother Ink Cartridges

    ReplyDelete
  9. I'm having a tiny issue I cant seem to be able to subscribe your rss feed, I'm using google reader fyi.
    Hi, do you like sexy women? Check liseli seks !
    600 high authority UK directory submission and 400 search engine submission

    ReplyDelete
  10. articles is really excellent : D. Good job, cheers
    Im happy that I discovered this page, Ill bookmark it, Extremely beneficial web page, Maintain going
    shopbymark

    ReplyDelete
  11. like the first point you made there, but I am not sure I could pratcially apply that in a contructive way.
    Visit Mediafire Movies for SEnuke Cracked, Hotfile Downloads and more.|Visit rapidshare movies for XRumer Cracked, cracked softwares and more.
    heshopbymark

    ReplyDelete
  12. is is a way to chew over explaining this.
    Good article, m8
    I will definetely come back to see more.
    HiSarah Berger

    ReplyDelete
  13. I cnduot bvleiee taht I culod aulaclty uesdtannrd waht I was rdnaieg. Unisg the icndeblire pweor of the hmuan mnid, aocdcrnig to rseecrah at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it dsenot mttaer in waht oderr the lterets in a wrod are, the olny irpoamtnt tihng is taht the frsit and lsat ltteer be in the rhgit pclae. The sodium hypochlorite amazon
    china air purifier
    korean air purifier brands

    ReplyDelete
  14. I'm having a weird issue I cant get my reader to pickup your feed, I'm using google reader by the way.
    Keep working, wonderful job! Exactly the info I had to know.
    shopbymark

    ReplyDelete